i'm finally beginning to enjoy everything about my life. there are many many road bumps along the way but what can i do but ride it out. my life isnt perfect, and its not where i want to be but i'll get there. i'm enjoying my life.
i'm still a little scared of getting hurt but sadly, i'm expecting it. i dont know why. karma...that's who i'm really waiting for., but until then, i'm enjoying this life of mine.

i miss talking on the phone until the sun comes up. i miss sleeping on the phone and waking up and hearing your breath on the phone. i miss having someone there that wants to be w/ me all the time. i may not want my past back, but i want parts of it. i want what i once had, in small doses. i want to be catered to. i want to be loved like i was the only woman in the world. i'm not asking for too much right?
i feel like it may be too much for some while others are willing to be on the phone w me for a lifetime as long as i'm there.
thats why i have to be strong enough let go and live.
dont search. but wait patiently.

it's easier to say nothing at all and blame it on karma. the things that happen in your life is your fault. and if karma ever comes your way it's because you did something to upset her of course.
I've realized a few things in these couple of days...i realized that there are certain things i already expect certain people to do because they are who they are, and i should not get upset about the things they do. yes, it's a harsh betrayal but you already expected it, so i accepted it. i know it's not something you accept, just because you expect it, but it's easier to breathe that way.
you already know faithful isn't a word to describe them so knowing this....you should already know they wouldn't be. it's not like that word describes you either. it's not like you're squeaky clean...so that's why i accept it.